Tool Selection
Could be someone I know, someone I don't know, fictional characters, dead people. I don't care, I'm an equal opportunity complainer when it comes to complete dickwads.
Wherever there's a Complete Tool, I'll follow closely behind with my anonymous bitching. 'Cuz that'll show 'em.
Wherever there's a Complete Tool, I'll follow closely behind with my anonymous bitching. 'Cuz that'll show 'em.
About Me
Anti-Tool Committee
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Monday, September 19, 2011
Checking Back In
I have been checked out for too long. I got tired of writing in circles about the frustrating times at work. I thought that, if I stopped giving myself a passive outlet for diffusing the majority of my anger, that I would learn how to focus it fully on what really matters: setting things right around the office.
Not so much.
What's that old maxim? You can lead a horse's ass to water....or something. For all my trouble, I am now an expert with reasoning with brick walls.
So, I'm back with some of your old favorite characters: MisManager, EmployeeVonMunchausen and Jailbait. Over the last few months, there have been some new additions to the happy family. Meet:
SchoolGirl
I seriously love this girl to death. MisManager is hellbent on hating her to death. She goes to school on days and during times when MisManager wants her there the most -- no matter when her classes are.
CoffeeBitch
He's a good dude. He probably deserves a better nickname, but I dubbed him this in his first post appearance. He's studying to be a doctor right now. Even after he gets his M.D., though, he will be Dr. CoffeeBitch. That's how this works.
TruckStop
An unpolished girl with a heart of gold. 10k gold. I think I like her best, because she's the only person I've ever met that can out-awkward me in a conversation. That is extremely hard to do.
Goldfish (or 50-First-Days ... I haven't decided yet)
Our new security guy. He has been on the job for over a week now. I have explained his job to him every single day. At least twice. He still doesn't get it. I wonder if he just likes the attention or if he's related to Dory.
Maybe his new nickname will just be Dory. I'll choose by the next time I have to write about him.
Which should be tomorrow.
Not so much.
What's that old maxim? You can lead a horse's ass to water....or something. For all my trouble, I am now an expert with reasoning with brick walls.
| For best results, create your own audience of Papaya Guys. |
SchoolGirl
I seriously love this girl to death. MisManager is hellbent on hating her to death. She goes to school on days and during times when MisManager wants her there the most -- no matter when her classes are.
CoffeeBitch
He's a good dude. He probably deserves a better nickname, but I dubbed him this in his first post appearance. He's studying to be a doctor right now. Even after he gets his M.D., though, he will be Dr. CoffeeBitch. That's how this works.
TruckStop
An unpolished girl with a heart of gold. 10k gold. I think I like her best, because she's the only person I've ever met that can out-awkward me in a conversation. That is extremely hard to do.
Goldfish (or 50-First-Days ... I haven't decided yet)
Our new security guy. He has been on the job for over a week now. I have explained his job to him every single day. At least twice. He still doesn't get it. I wonder if he just likes the attention or if he's related to Dory.
Which should be tomorrow.
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3 comments:
Poor CoffeeBitch. Saddled forever with an unfortunate nickname (that makes me giggle every time I see it). I love people with the ability to make any conversation awkward. It's a unique talent.
I do feel sad that I can't think of another nickname for him. He really is a good guy.
TruckStop is a special kind of talent, who will interject randomly (and dorkily) into conversations with phrases that don't fit the context.
"Ooooh! Check you out!!"
*crickets*
woot! new blog entries!