Tool Selection

Could be someone I know, someone I don't know, fictional characters, dead people. I don't care, I'm an equal opportunity complainer when it comes to complete dickwads.

Wherever there's a Complete Tool, I'll follow closely behind with my anonymous bitching. 'Cuz that'll show 'em.

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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Middle Man


First off, I will give you credit for actually being of the female persuasion. It’s not my fault the commonly used term describes a male.

You’re handling a matter of great importance on behalf of your manager. This is something that countless thousands of people do on a daily basis. What they don’t do, is call someone who is totally unrelated the situation you’re indirectly resolving and get frustrated with them when they have to ask you eleventy billion questions about what you need. You are essentially doing what is commonly referred to as “starting all over again from scratch” at this point.

A better solution would be to wait just one additional day for the person that was directly handling this to return to the office. I know, I know, the extremely important and totally loyal client will discontinue to do business with you if you don’t get this matter resolved right this second. Even though, by my logic, they can’t be that loyal if some little thing like waiting one additional day for a conversation and a signature is going to send them running for the hills. This is not a matter that will lose them money or cause them to do anything additional that will take up their precious time. It literally effects them not one iota to wait an additional day.

Your freaking out on the phone with me because your boss wanted my boss to sign something last week, but waited until today to mention it, doesn’t help anyone. My manager is not here. Note the sunshiney demeanor. That’s always a dead giveaway. No amount of reasoning with me is going to make her magically appear in the office as if called by a genie. Trust me, if I could make someone appear in front of me via genie, it would not be her.

Lack of preparation on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part. I’ve been as helpful as I can be, but forging signatures on documents is not something you can sweet talk me into with your whiney guilt trip. I also have a sneaking suspicion that my manager has not agreed to the terms you’re trying to strong-arm me into. We’ll just wait and see.

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